Holy Cow! Here comes Delhi

As soon as you leave the international terminal you know you’re somewhere different. Hundreds of eager people who don’t want to pay the entrance fee queue outside the arrivals waiting for friends and family. Old-fashioned soldiers with wooden rifles patrol the area and old school British style taxis wait.

After getting our bearings we ventured out on a day tour of Delhi. Armed with a camera and our trusty chauffeur Sharma we set out to see the major sights. First up was the Hindi temple of Birla Mandir. There was no escaping the application of red spots...

Next stop was the Indian Parliament. Boasting the largest democracy in the world, with a population of 1.2 billion it was no surprise that the parliament was truly massive


Just down the road is India Gate – India’s national war memorial

Clint’s ‘Jesus Loves Me’ shirt was in the wash so we decided to pay homage to Allah by going to Jama Masjid. It is India’s largest mosque and can accommodate the bending bodies of 25,000 worshippers. With skirts on to cover the infidel flesh our shorts exposed we were free to wander the pigeon splattered courtyard (barefoot of course) whilst ignoring begging street urchins.

A stone’s throw away is Lal Qila (the Red Fort). Paying 12.5 times as much as the locals we went through security (metal detector, frisk and bag check) and into the fort. It’s everything you’d expect from a fort: encircled by big stone walls and a moat with high turrets to keep watch and lots of good stuff in the middle.


Last up on the agenda was Humayun’s Tomb. The Moghul Humayun got off to a bad start, losing Delhi and most of his fathers empire at the start of his reign. He managed to regain it all just before he died and now has a very impressive tomb. When we entered we got an idea of what it must be like to be a famous cricket player in India – the local kids were like bees to honey and even wanted autographs.


Amazingly nothing was stolen from our pockets or bags (very cynical of us!). The grounds of the tomb are tranquil and away from the city noise. It would be a great place for a game of cricket but even the youngsters knew that this suggestion wasn’t a good idea, they must have tried it before..


Random Fact: Apparently Holy cow’s are milked. By whom and when is anybodies guess.

Highlights:

- Indian man love. Whilst public displays of affection between men and women are severely frowned upon, as is homosexuality, brotherly man love is rampant. It could take the form of two guys holding hands or walking with their arms around one another or they may even be lying in each other’s laps.

- General craziness. Delhi is one of the worlds oldest cities. With no town planning it is a chaotic dirty mess. Throw in a caste system and huge discrepancies in wealth and you end up with a dogs breakfast – this explains the abundance of dogs roaming the streets.

- Holy cows. Cows are sacred and can do as they please – so they do. Being a holy cow doesn’t look like fun. You’re generally ignored and left to scavenge through Indian hay (rubbish) and wander the narrow, traffic filled streets. The cows get their own back by startling tourists and defecating in the streets. Give us a paddock in a NZ dairy farm any day.
- India chai, do try it.

Lessons Learned:

- It’s no surprise that most religious temples don’t allow shoes or bare flesh but stone floors are cold in the morning so take socks and wear trousers.

- We’ve only been in town a few days but we’ve made loads of friends. There is no denying our popularity. Our dress sense is incredible and everything we wear receives praise and accolades from our new buddies. Dress down and rehearse your “dumb dumb” routine before venturing out.