Rishikesh

Seeking a colder climate and somewhere green we grabbed a bus and headed to the holy city of Rishikesh. Set in the foothills of the Himalayas, Rishikesh is a very popular yoga and meditation retreat.

It's claim to fame (and what self-respecting Indian town doesn't have a claim to fame?) is that the Beatles famously ran away to Rishikesh to discover "the truth". Unlike the Beatles we weren't there for the truth, we were after some tramping and a swim in the river ganges.


We spent our first afternoon riding bicycles - the dodgiest ones we've encountered to date. With brakes breaking and chains coming off repeatedly we battled on with our one speed wonders as we tracked the course of the ganges.


The following day we decided to hire a guide and do some tramping. The guide took us to a nearby hill with promises of views of the Himalayas at the top. Things didn't start well with the guide asking why Clint was wearing "hot pants" when we he was in fact sporting stubbies. The hot temperatures created problems for our guide, and as he so aptly put it "I have more than a little problem with the hot".


After an admittedly tough climb we reached the top and were rewarded by a hazy view which disappointingly obstructed the himalayas.


And of course we had to fulfill the objective of swimming in the ganges. Colder than we were expecting but hopefully clean!


Random Fact: The most famous man in India is arguably Amitabh Bachchan aka 'Big B'. Now 66 years young, Big B was a pioneer of Bollywood and even managed to squeeze in three years as an MP in the 80's. These days his image is used to sell everything from cement to ballpoint pens.

Highlights:
- Seeing old western people in full hippy get up. Back home they may be senior managers but they left those responsibilities and their self respect in the departure lounge when they went in search of Sgt. Pepper and His Lonely Hearts Club
- Being invited back to Ajay's (tramping guide) family house for chai. Just when you begin to think that Indian hospitality doesn't exist they prove you wrong!
- Travelling with a civil engineer. Not only do they provide topical conversation about basic infrastructure, or more commonly the lack of, but every Indian they meet knows what their job entails and they are always suitable impressed. These two former public servants wish they could say the same

Lessons Learned
- Don't do the rafting which is on offer. A quick cycle up the river reveals weak rapids and a waste of money. If you really want to get the heart racing you're better off walking blind folded down the street
- The Rishikesh area is beautiful and a gateway to the north - we'll be back for more
- You're not allowed to play games in the cafe franchise 'Coffee Day'. If you don't believe us try playing a game of chess. Ridiculous
- Indian KFC is better than Indian McDonalds. McD's was always up against it with no beef but the Maharaja Mac failed to impress. Meanwhile the locals have sneakily altered Colonel Sanders secret recipe of 11 herbs and spices to somehow include traces of masala! Even so, there were no complaints from the bro below.

Jodhpur, Jaisalmer and Camels

Eager to press on and see what else Rajasthan had to offer we visited Jodhpur, aka the blue city, because of the colour of its old town houses. Once bitten, twice shy, our expectations were low as we had been previously unimpressed by the amount of pink at the ‘pink city’ (Jaipur). It turns out this was a good thing as we weren’t disappointed as there wasn’t that much blue! Perhaps it was our view, and maybe you need a higher vantage point to get the full effect... here is someone elses photo.

Jodhpurs main attraction is the mighty Mehrangarh Fort. Suffering from a fort overload we didn’t venture inside but it looked impregnable from our guest house.


We didn’t stay long in Jodhpur as the wide open spaces of the nearby desert were calling, so we set sail for the outpost of Jaisalmer. On the way we passed through mostly barren waste land which probably explains why the Indian government has tested nuclear weapons in the area, it’s also very close to Pakistan... Being close to India’s misunderstood brother means that the pride of the Indian Air Force conduct regular fly-overs. It wouldn’t surprise us if India has installed horns in their jets, such is the Indian love for this device.

Jaisalmer is made up of winding narrow streets. The town is small so it’s easy to get around and hard to get lost which is great for exploring. Once again the pride of the town is its fort, which looks especially cool at night time.


It was finally time to escape the mass of humanity which is India and go somewhere quiet where we could sit and think - the Thar Desert. We signed on for a “non touristic” camel safari that surprisingly came with very “touristic” turbans. After driving out of town we were promptly introduced to our new best friends for the next two days: John (Clint), Desert Boy (Kerry) and ATM (Dan).

Camels are great fun, if you haven’t ridden them before you should definitely try it. Getting them to stand up is cool as they unfold themselves and it’s sure to catch you off guard the first time. Camels are tall brutes and afford you a great view of what’s going on.

We wish we could say that we broke camp and headed to the most remote corner of India. Instead we spent the first 30 minutes following the highway while the guides used their cell phones – even the camel sherpa guys have busy social lives these days!

Things got better when we turned west and headed further into the desert. After passing a village containing children that wanted 40 rupees per photo we entered the desert proper.


After mastering the basics it was time to pick up the pace. The guides encouraged this by hurling encouragement/abuse at the camels and giving them a bit of a whipping with sticks. This did the trick and before we knew it we were amongst some great sand dunes and at our camp for the night.

Seeing the sand dunes up close gave us a burst of energy. We spent the next hour running and jumping about the place frolicking in the sand. It was just like being at the beach and we had to keep reminding ourselves we couldn’t go swimming afterwards!


Being away from the cities and the pollution meant we got to watch a superb sunset and had a magnificent view of the stars later that night. Below is a photo of the first three stars to emerge that night.


After a night under the stars it was time to get back into it. We were a bit sore from riding the day before, no stirrups means that you flop about ungainly and you have to keep your wits to keep yourself intact.

We were picked up in the afternoon and taken back into town. It was an assault to the senses to be back amongst the horn honking and crowded streets of Jaisalmer – welcome back to India. On the upside a warm bed and hot shower were just what the doctor ordered.

Random Fact: the economies of scale are amazing over here. 1.2 billion Indians means that cell phone coverage is literally everywhere and you can send a txt for as little as $0.004 NZD while calls aren’t much more - $0.04 NZD per minute... remind us again which country is third world?

Highlights:
- Hearing an explanation of how our main guide learnt English as a boy. Being illiterate and with no previous exposure to foreigners it meant he learnt one word at a time, often with hilarious results which left us in stitches
- The first five minutes of riding a running camel. It’s an enormous novelty as you balance precariously and watch the others trying to do the same
- Sipping a semi cold beer in the desert after running up a storm in the sand dunes

Lessons Learned:
- If a male camel froths at the mouth and makes disturbingly primal noises then it’s probably winter, the camel season of love
- When you’re in the desert with men whose primary interest is camels you quickly learn a lot about them. The cheapest price you can buy a camel for is 15,000 rupees - $600 NZD. If you buy during winter (tourist season) you’ll have to shell out almost double - 25,000.
- The men of the desert are very poor. They allege to see precious little of the money that we shell out in town for the trip. It’s actually quite sad that most of the guides, who are grown men, can’t afford their own camel
- Some people are brave (is that the right word?) enough to try and setup farms in the desert. Of all the crops they could pick from they chose watermelon and cucumber. To top it off it hasn’t rained for three years!
- Two days and one night on a camel is enough. Anymore and you’re just asking for trouble

Ranthambore and Udaipur

The trio waved goodbye to Pushkar and set off on what would become our craziest day of travel. Our destination Sawai Madhopur, some 300km's away and home to the Ranthambore National Park and most importantly tigers!

Five local buses, two rickshaws and a donkey ride later we had arrived. For those unfamiliar with a local bus they're amazing. Anything goes. You can spit and throw rubbish on the floor to your hearts content. We didn't spy any other tourists but made friends with plenty of the locals.

The next afternoon we set off to see the national park. There are two ways, by jeep or canter (a modified truck which seats about 30 people). We opted for the canter.


Entering the park is like Kiplings Jungle Book meets Jurassic Park. Large stone gateway entrances lead onto sloping plains covered in jungle and scrub. Tourists in safari gear (probably purchased especially for this occasion) with ridiculously over-sized cameras crane their necks at the slightest movement and hang off every word from the tour guide.

You have a 25% chance of seeing a tiger and they only come out at dusk (or dawn) so the first two hours is spent looking at deer, crocodiles and plenty of birds, some of which had obviously seen humans before.


With our time running out and the closest sighting of a tiger being some old foot prints, the driver turned and headed for home. We were only slightly disappointed because the other animals and the whole safari experience was very cool. As we were passing through the exit gates another canter was parked up, a sure sign that there's something worth seeing.

Giving the popular piece of jungle our full attention we were rewarded by hearing a roar and seeing a flash of tiger. By now more canters had arrived on the seen but our driver had managed to weasel his way into the best vantage point. To our delight a tiger strolled between bushes and paused in the open for a good couple of minutes. Creating an instant photographic frenzy and cries of "look a tiger!" (really? is that really a tiger? are you sure? and they don't like noise so we should be quiet?). His mate came along behind him so not only did we see a tiger but we saw two!


With our mission completed in one attempt we were rather pleased with ourselves. We decided to haul west across Rajasthan. After arriving by train in Kota a local recommended that we visit the town park which we did. The Chambal river runs next to the park and we basked in the glory of the massive power plants on the other side - nature at it's best.


A local art competition was underway and two girls approached to show us some of the pieces on display. We found ourselves in a ridiculous situation - swamped by Indian paparazzi and being quizzed on where we come from, our names, what we think of India etc etc we were interrogated for a good 30 minutes. If we had of bought a paper the next day we are confident we'd be on the front page.

Kota doesn't get a favourable review in our guide book and it isn't a mainstream tourist destination. The young locals we met weren't too chuffed on the place either, referring to it as "the city of thieves". Coming from locals, we can only imagine what it's like for tourists!

It was a good thing that we'd organised an overnight bus to take us to the brightlights of Udaipur. Unfortunately the bus turned out to be a local bus which meant the three of us sat shoulder to shoulder on a bench seat and tried our best to get some sleep.

After a restless night we arrived in Udaipur at dawn. Have you ever seen James Bonds Octopussy? It was filmed in Udaipur and each night the hotels play the movie on their rooftops.


Udaipur is everything India should be. The streets are clean and people let you walk around without hassling you. We even saw a dog on a leash!

Whilst out taking in the sights we joined some locals for a spot of cricket. Photo below shows K. McCallum coming around the wicket to D. Rowling. Of course there is huge controversery around the outcome of this delivery, but the massive red cherry on the bat would imply that D. Rowling is in the affirmative.


We also took in a cooking class and helped make four dishes. The end result was a fabulous meal, the stand out dishes being the malai kofta and the yoghurt lassi. We wanted to cook the dishes ourselves sometime in the future so we took unbelievably thorough notes. If you want to try your hand click here.

Random Fact: Udaipur has a magnificent lake. Unfortunately thanks to three years of drought the lake is only half full, or is that half empty?

Highlights:
- Correcting the locals bowling actions to ensure they don't chuck the ball. This is a never ending task, but don't worry we're setting things straight (magic pun!) one young Indian at a time.
- Seeing tigers in the wild. Magnificent animals made even better in their natural habitat
- Rooftops. With quality land space at a premium the Indian backyard is the rooftop. Great for relaxing, unwinding and temporarily escaping India

Lessons Learned:
- Women cook at home (and at cooking classes), men cook at restaurants
- An injured mouse can survive a fall from a second floor window. The husband at the cooking class unwittingly demonstrated this as he literally sent the vermin flying
- Convicts are transported on local buses, albeit in shackles and under armed guard. One such passenger joined us on our overnight bus trip